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Questions To Ask Before Marriage

There are many questions to ask before marriage, and the answers to those questions can have a huge impact on whether the union will last or not. In the excitement of dating and getting engaged, couples sometimes forget to get the most pertinent information about a perspective mate. It is easy to become enthralled with their physical appearance or caught up in a whirlwind romance. But when the dust settles from a tempestuous courtship and before couples say, "I do" several important issues must be resolved. After all, when two people vow to marry, they must also realize that the vow includes a promise to live together until death. That is all the more reason to consider questions to ask before marriage to learn more about a potential mate. The first concern should be does he or she believe in God? Asking about a perspective spouse's personal faith will determine, in part, whether they will be forthcoming about answering other queries. The second question should address whether or not a prospective mate is or has been married. Thirdly, singles should know if their intended has children. Last but not least, are they gainfully employed?



For a Christian, one of the foremost questions to ask before marriage should be, "Do you believe in God?" A man or woman's personal belief system will override every other aspect of wedlock. Unsaved or unchurched individuals will have difficulty living with someone who is a believer in Jesus Christ. No matter how much two people are attracted physically, having two opposing belief systems will wreak havoc in the home and cause such a division that lasting harmony will be almost impossible. A Christian wife married to a non-believing husband may be forced to obey and submit to a man who is not obedient or submissive to God. Therefore, a believing wife will constantly be pulled in two different directions until her husband gives his heart to Jesus Christ as a born-again believer. But an unsaved husband can be won by the holy conversation, or lifestyle, of the wife. "Likewise, ye wives, be in subjection to your own husbands; that, if any obey not the word, they also may without the word, be won by the conversation of the wives; While they behold your chaste conversation coupled with fear" (I Peter 3:1-2).



Asking a perspective mate if they are married may seem odd; but surprisingly people do get engaged to men and women who are still wed to others! Singles unwittingly fall prey to Internet dating predators that are already married but seek opportunities to form relationships for unscrupulous purposes. Potential mates who have lived separately from a spouse for several years may have failed to get a legal divorce. In almost every state in the Union and abroad, marrying more than one spouse at a time is called bigamy. Questions to ask before marriage for singles concerned about whether their intended is truly free to wed can best be answered by doing an online background check. Many Internet agencies offer do-it-yourself investigative services for a small fee. It is far better to pay a monthly nominal fee than to pay a lifetime for marrying the wrong person. If a fiancee insists that the divorce was final, asking to see the divorce papers is not out of line.



Important questions to ask before marriage also include determining if a potential mate has children. Issues involving children from a previous marriage or relationship will impact a new union for the lifetime of the child, especially if the potential mate is a custodial parent. Marrying a spouse with kids means that the children may have to live with the newlyweds. An inability to make lifestyle changes to accommodate a new marriage with kids can spell disaster. Child support is also a major consideration for couples considering holy wedlock. Part of a prospective partner's income will be diverted to caring for a child until the age of 18 or after graduating from college. Singles engaged to a perspective spouse who pays support should consider the following questions to ask before marriage: "How much child support do you pay?" "Do you also pay alimony?" "What visitation rights do you have?" "Will your kids stay with us periodically?" Blended families consisting of his, hers, and their children, will also face additional challenges of sibling rivalry, changing schools, and providing financial and emotional support.



One of the most crucial questions to ask before marriage is "Do you have a job?" Having money or the lack thereof can either make or break a happy home. If a potential partner is unemployed or underemployed and overburdened with debt, the task of providing for the family may fall solely on one spouse. Sadly, there are men and women who prey on hapless individuals desperate to get married. But smooth talking and romance won't pay the bills. Engaged couples should be mature enough to thoroughly discuss personal finances before committing to a lifelong relationship. Two-income couples may want to determine how the bills will be shared, whether home ownership is feasible, and how much money can be saved.



Other questions to ask before marriage regarding personal assets and liabilities that will be shared after the wedding are also essential. A full disclosure, including indebtedness from student loans, alimony, child support, real estate, and auto loans is necessary before couples should feel comfortable about walking down the aisle. If the relationship has become serious enough to warrant intimate financial details, potential partners should also discuss valuable assets that will become jointly owned. A word of caution: until singles are comfortable about a perspective mate's motives and personal background, disclosure of account numbers, bank personal identification numbers, passwords, and even social security numbers should be withheld. In cases where considerable assets are involved, consulting an attorney about drafting a prenuptial agreement might also be a wise decision.
Questions To Ask Before Marriage Reviewed by Anonymous on 9:41 PM Rating: 5
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