Saving A Marriage After An Affair
The process of saving a marriage after an affair can be tedious and requires concentrated effort by both partners. When infidelity threatens to dismantle a marriage, husbands and wives must work doubly hard to restore trust, rebuild communication, and rekindle romance. After being unfaithful, a guilty spouse may find it difficult to win a mate's confidence again. The offended husband or wife will surely have feelings of betrayal, rejection, and resentment; because adultery violates the sanctity of holy wedlock and is a criminal trespass of a loved one's emotions. After the initial shock of discovering that a mate has committed adultery, questions may loom large that haunt a betrayed spouse. Often a husband or wife wonders what they may have done to cause a spouse to have wandering eyes or decide to take a lover. Or the wounds may go so deep that they are simply not able to express the hurt, confusion, or mental anguish at the thought of an indiscretion.
While many couples feel there is no hope for saving a marriage after an affair, there are solutions to mending broken hearts. The process begins with genuine repentance, then forgiveness of the guilty party, followed by renewing vows of fidelity, and lastly with both partners making a diligent effort to put away the past and begin a renewed monogamous relationship. Husbands or wives who are guilty of committing adultery must first repent from the desire to lust after someone other than the husband or wife. Men and women, especially Christians, who allow strong desire to drive them to fornicate are not only guilty of disobeying the commandment of God, but also of defiling the body. Therefore genuine, heartfelt repentance will restore a guilty spouse back to fellowship with their heavenly Father.
The Bible condemns the sin of adultery and harlotry: "Know ye not that your bodies are the members of Christ? shall I then take the members of Christ, and make them the members of an harlot? God forbid. What? know ye not that he which is joined to an harlot is one body? for two, saith he, shall be one flesh. But he that is joined unto the Lord is one spirit. Flee fornication. Every sin that a man doeth is without the body; but he that committeth fornication sinneth against his own body. What? know ye not that your body is the temple of the Holy Ghost which is in you, which ye have of God, and ye are not your own? For ye are bought with a price: therefore glorify God in your body, and in your spirit, which are God's" (I Corinthians 6:15-20)..
Saving a marriage after an affair requires honesty and discretion. Once repentance has been made to the Lord, a wayward husband or wife should confess the transgression and sincerely ask their mate for forgiveness. Being as open and honest as possible without further injuring an innocent spouse is far better than continuing to keep secrets or an illicit liaison. But sharing hurtful truths requires wisdom and timing. Husbands and wives in the process of saving a marriage after an affair should be sensitive when confessing to a loved one. Before approaching a wounded spouse, partners should consider how they would feel if the proverbial shoe was on the other foot. A guilty partner who places themselves in the position of their husband or wife is more apt to deal gently while confessing wrongdoing.
The role of an innocent spouse in saving a marriage after an affair is to listen and find the resolve to forgive, particularly if the guilty party is truly remorseful. While the anguish of marital betrayal is hard to bear, rescuing the marriage from the threat of divorce requires reaching deep within the soul and spirit. The value couples place on the relationship will determine how much they are willing to forgive. Spouses should view the long term benefits of matrimony instead of focusing on short term disappointments. No relationship is perfect; and no individual remains the same. As men and women age chronologically and mature emotionally, there should be a stronger desire to live above reproach. A single indiscretion, no matter how traumatic or hurtful, should not deter couples who are interested in saving a marriage after an affair. The innocent spouse's ability to release a mate from guilt and forgive is crucial if reconciliation is to begin.
Renewing vows of fidelity is also a vital part of saving a marriage after an affair. Spouses who have been involved in extramarital affairs should make every effort to cut all communication with an illicit lover. Adulterers should discard telephone numbers, refrain from emailing or texting, and put as much distance between them and a lover as possible. A refusal to open the door to any communication with a former mistress or suitor will demonstrate to the victimized spouse the seriousness of intentions to give up the affair. By continually building up walls between the adulterer and the lover, and tearing down walls of miscommunication or distrust between husbands and wives, the marital relationship can begin to mend.
Saving a marriage after an affair may seem impossible; but by staying focused on the goal of restoring the relationship, couples can succeed. Reconciliation not only demands that guilty spouses forsake all others and innocent husbands and wives to forgive, but also that both couples work hard to salvage the love and emotional bond that was once part of the relationship. Marriage is a lifelong commitment between one man and one woman. When a third party becomes involved, the relationship is bound to suffer; but love covers a multitude of sins. Focusing on the future and forgetting the past is the best way to repair broken hearts.
While many couples feel there is no hope for saving a marriage after an affair, there are solutions to mending broken hearts. The process begins with genuine repentance, then forgiveness of the guilty party, followed by renewing vows of fidelity, and lastly with both partners making a diligent effort to put away the past and begin a renewed monogamous relationship. Husbands or wives who are guilty of committing adultery must first repent from the desire to lust after someone other than the husband or wife. Men and women, especially Christians, who allow strong desire to drive them to fornicate are not only guilty of disobeying the commandment of God, but also of defiling the body. Therefore genuine, heartfelt repentance will restore a guilty spouse back to fellowship with their heavenly Father.
The Bible condemns the sin of adultery and harlotry: "Know ye not that your bodies are the members of Christ? shall I then take the members of Christ, and make them the members of an harlot? God forbid. What? know ye not that he which is joined to an harlot is one body? for two, saith he, shall be one flesh. But he that is joined unto the Lord is one spirit. Flee fornication. Every sin that a man doeth is without the body; but he that committeth fornication sinneth against his own body. What? know ye not that your body is the temple of the Holy Ghost which is in you, which ye have of God, and ye are not your own? For ye are bought with a price: therefore glorify God in your body, and in your spirit, which are God's" (I Corinthians 6:15-20)..
Saving a marriage after an affair requires honesty and discretion. Once repentance has been made to the Lord, a wayward husband or wife should confess the transgression and sincerely ask their mate for forgiveness. Being as open and honest as possible without further injuring an innocent spouse is far better than continuing to keep secrets or an illicit liaison. But sharing hurtful truths requires wisdom and timing. Husbands and wives in the process of saving a marriage after an affair should be sensitive when confessing to a loved one. Before approaching a wounded spouse, partners should consider how they would feel if the proverbial shoe was on the other foot. A guilty partner who places themselves in the position of their husband or wife is more apt to deal gently while confessing wrongdoing.
The role of an innocent spouse in saving a marriage after an affair is to listen and find the resolve to forgive, particularly if the guilty party is truly remorseful. While the anguish of marital betrayal is hard to bear, rescuing the marriage from the threat of divorce requires reaching deep within the soul and spirit. The value couples place on the relationship will determine how much they are willing to forgive. Spouses should view the long term benefits of matrimony instead of focusing on short term disappointments. No relationship is perfect; and no individual remains the same. As men and women age chronologically and mature emotionally, there should be a stronger desire to live above reproach. A single indiscretion, no matter how traumatic or hurtful, should not deter couples who are interested in saving a marriage after an affair. The innocent spouse's ability to release a mate from guilt and forgive is crucial if reconciliation is to begin.
Renewing vows of fidelity is also a vital part of saving a marriage after an affair. Spouses who have been involved in extramarital affairs should make every effort to cut all communication with an illicit lover. Adulterers should discard telephone numbers, refrain from emailing or texting, and put as much distance between them and a lover as possible. A refusal to open the door to any communication with a former mistress or suitor will demonstrate to the victimized spouse the seriousness of intentions to give up the affair. By continually building up walls between the adulterer and the lover, and tearing down walls of miscommunication or distrust between husbands and wives, the marital relationship can begin to mend.
Saving a marriage after an affair may seem impossible; but by staying focused on the goal of restoring the relationship, couples can succeed. Reconciliation not only demands that guilty spouses forsake all others and innocent husbands and wives to forgive, but also that both couples work hard to salvage the love and emotional bond that was once part of the relationship. Marriage is a lifelong commitment between one man and one woman. When a third party becomes involved, the relationship is bound to suffer; but love covers a multitude of sins. Focusing on the future and forgetting the past is the best way to repair broken hearts.
Saving A Marriage After An Affair
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