Healing After Divorce For Christians
The process of healing after divorce for Christians may be more positive than that for non-believers because of a personal faith in God. Deciding to end a marriage can be a difficult decision for any couple, but a believer's reliance on the Lord makes the process more bearable. In devastating circumstances, the Holy Scriptures and a personal faith in Jesus Christ are key elements in overcoming not only the social stigma of divorce but also the emotional trauma of a marital breakup. Human beings are basically all alike: they fall in love with hopes of making the marriage last. But recent divorce statistics bear witness to the fact that nearly half of new unions fail within the first ten years. Consequently, a growing number of newlyweds will eventually face the harsh reality that many Christian unions may not last until death. But the good news is that God's grace is sufficient even in the midst of a failed marriage. Healing after divorce for Christians is possible when former husbands and wives put their faith in the Word of God.
Marriage, as a holy institution ordained by the Creator, was originally intended to last forever. The Father's purpose was for one man to marry one woman and form a lifelong intimate bond capable of producing children. But because of sin and the hardness of man's heart, Moses began to allow husbands to "put away," or divorce their wives. Since Old Testament times, divorce has increasingly become the norm rather than the exception. Statistics of failed marriages among Christians has been steadily on the increase, particularly since the late 80s. Current statistics among denominational believers indicate 28 to 38 percent of marriages will end in divorce. Because of the prevalence of breakups among believers, healing after divorce for Christians is an even greater priority. The ability of the Holy Spirit to bring restoration and renewal to those who are hurting is a source of comfort for those who trust God and believe in His Word.
The process of healing after divorce for Christians should begin with some soul searching. When a marriage fails, no one party is solely responsible; either there were acts of omission or acts of commission. In other words, either one partner failed to do something to make the relationship work or committed an act that aided in its demise. Whatever the case may be, facing the truth about guilt or innocence in contributing to a failed relationship is a good place to begin the healing process. Once an ex-spouse can admit to the role played in the union's demise, the next step is to forgive the guilty party. But the process of forgiveness requires God's grace. The Bible is explicit in requiring believers to forgive before they can be forgiven. "After this manner therefore pray ye: Our Father which art in heaven, Hallowed be thy name. Thy kingdom come, Thy will be done in earth, as it is in heaven. Give us this day our daily bread. And forgive us our debts, as we forgive our debtors. And lead us not into temptation, but deliver us from evil: For thine is the kingdom, and the power, and the glory, for ever. Amen. For if ye forgive men their trespasses, your heavenly Father will also forgive you: But if ye forgive not men their trespasses, neither will your Father forgive your trespasses" (Matthew 6:9-15).
The third step in healing after divorce for Christians is to personally release an offending spouse from the guilt of marital infidelity or other transgressions. Sometimes people say, "Well, I can forgive but I cannot forget!" God is not asking believers to forget that they have been hurt, but He is asking the Christian to allow Him to ease the pain of rejection and carry the burden of a wounded spirit. As a believer allows the Holy Spirit to take away the stony heart, forgiving and releasing a former mate becomes easier. In certain cases, a child of God must also forgive themselves for acts of omission or commission. By refusing to hold onto past personal transgressions, asking God and a former mate for forgiveness, and resolving to move forward; the Holy Spirit can bring healing from the devastating effects of a failed marriage.
Renewing spiritual vows is the fourth step in healing after divorce for Christians. Because God hates putting away, or divorce, a believer who chooses to permanently separate from a spouse, except for the cause of fornication, is in a precarious position. How can a Christian perform an act that is despised by God? And if God hates putting away, can a divorced child of God obtain forgiveness? The answer is that the Lord is sovereign and He looks upon the heart and judges accordingly. The motive for marital dissolution may be more important than the act itself. Divorcing a spouse in order to marry another or committing adultery without regard for the husband or wife or God is a different scenario than a Christian who chooses to leave a cheating spouse. But only the Lord can judge motive and issues of morality. Healing after divorce for Christians must begin with renewing spiritual vows, faithfully attending church, restoring fellowship with other believers, and growing daily by a diligent study of the Holy Bible.
Making a renewed spiritual commitment to God enables the Holy Spirit to perform a work of restoration in the heart, mind and soul of a Christian recovering from a failed marriage. The Spirit of God knows exactly where the wounded places are and how to repair the breaches of rejection, anger, resentment and pain. He knows how to burn up the chaff of broken vows and shattered dreams; and He is a Master Fixer of wounded souls. Through yielding to the Lord God; forgiving and releasing a former mate; forgiving yourself from acts of commission or omission; and renewing spiritual vows; the process of healing after divorce for Christians can have positive results with hope for a brighter future.
Marriage, as a holy institution ordained by the Creator, was originally intended to last forever. The Father's purpose was for one man to marry one woman and form a lifelong intimate bond capable of producing children. But because of sin and the hardness of man's heart, Moses began to allow husbands to "put away," or divorce their wives. Since Old Testament times, divorce has increasingly become the norm rather than the exception. Statistics of failed marriages among Christians has been steadily on the increase, particularly since the late 80s. Current statistics among denominational believers indicate 28 to 38 percent of marriages will end in divorce. Because of the prevalence of breakups among believers, healing after divorce for Christians is an even greater priority. The ability of the Holy Spirit to bring restoration and renewal to those who are hurting is a source of comfort for those who trust God and believe in His Word.
The process of healing after divorce for Christians should begin with some soul searching. When a marriage fails, no one party is solely responsible; either there were acts of omission or acts of commission. In other words, either one partner failed to do something to make the relationship work or committed an act that aided in its demise. Whatever the case may be, facing the truth about guilt or innocence in contributing to a failed relationship is a good place to begin the healing process. Once an ex-spouse can admit to the role played in the union's demise, the next step is to forgive the guilty party. But the process of forgiveness requires God's grace. The Bible is explicit in requiring believers to forgive before they can be forgiven. "After this manner therefore pray ye: Our Father which art in heaven, Hallowed be thy name. Thy kingdom come, Thy will be done in earth, as it is in heaven. Give us this day our daily bread. And forgive us our debts, as we forgive our debtors. And lead us not into temptation, but deliver us from evil: For thine is the kingdom, and the power, and the glory, for ever. Amen. For if ye forgive men their trespasses, your heavenly Father will also forgive you: But if ye forgive not men their trespasses, neither will your Father forgive your trespasses" (Matthew 6:9-15).
The third step in healing after divorce for Christians is to personally release an offending spouse from the guilt of marital infidelity or other transgressions. Sometimes people say, "Well, I can forgive but I cannot forget!" God is not asking believers to forget that they have been hurt, but He is asking the Christian to allow Him to ease the pain of rejection and carry the burden of a wounded spirit. As a believer allows the Holy Spirit to take away the stony heart, forgiving and releasing a former mate becomes easier. In certain cases, a child of God must also forgive themselves for acts of omission or commission. By refusing to hold onto past personal transgressions, asking God and a former mate for forgiveness, and resolving to move forward; the Holy Spirit can bring healing from the devastating effects of a failed marriage.
Renewing spiritual vows is the fourth step in healing after divorce for Christians. Because God hates putting away, or divorce, a believer who chooses to permanently separate from a spouse, except for the cause of fornication, is in a precarious position. How can a Christian perform an act that is despised by God? And if God hates putting away, can a divorced child of God obtain forgiveness? The answer is that the Lord is sovereign and He looks upon the heart and judges accordingly. The motive for marital dissolution may be more important than the act itself. Divorcing a spouse in order to marry another or committing adultery without regard for the husband or wife or God is a different scenario than a Christian who chooses to leave a cheating spouse. But only the Lord can judge motive and issues of morality. Healing after divorce for Christians must begin with renewing spiritual vows, faithfully attending church, restoring fellowship with other believers, and growing daily by a diligent study of the Holy Bible.
Making a renewed spiritual commitment to God enables the Holy Spirit to perform a work of restoration in the heart, mind and soul of a Christian recovering from a failed marriage. The Spirit of God knows exactly where the wounded places are and how to repair the breaches of rejection, anger, resentment and pain. He knows how to burn up the chaff of broken vows and shattered dreams; and He is a Master Fixer of wounded souls. Through yielding to the Lord God; forgiving and releasing a former mate; forgiving yourself from acts of commission or omission; and renewing spiritual vows; the process of healing after divorce for Christians can have positive results with hope for a brighter future.
Healing After Divorce For Christians
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