Overcoming Marriage Problems
Couples may have success overcoming marriage problems through counseling, mediation, and spiritual guidance. The institution of marriage consists not only of relationship issues, but also mental and spiritual health. When husbands and wives reach an impasse in their relationship, the first inclination may be to end it all. But there are agencies in and out of the church that can help troubled couples put their marriage back together again. Christian and non-Christian organizations, churches, licensed family and relationship therapists, psychologists, and clergy offer varying degrees of low- and no-cost counseling. Marriage retreats, seminars, and short-term courses are also available for families who need help dealing with conflict. Couples should exhaust every means of reconciliation before deciding to separate or divorce, including seeking God. "If any of you lack wisdom, let him ask of God, that giveth to all men liberally, and upbraideth not; and it shall be given him. But let him ask in faith, nothing wavering. For he that wavereth is like a wave of the sea driven with the wind and tossed. For let not that man think that he shall receive any thing of the Lord" (James 1:5-7).
Husbands and wives interested in overcoming marriage problems must have the right perspective on wedlock. When two join together as one, they form a single social unit having male and female components. Over time, that single unit should become so cohesive and so formidable that nothing from the outside world can destroy it. Male and female should learn to work together as a team, eating the same food, sleeping in the same bed, doing the same things. When an enemy comes into the household, whether the enemy is called discord, confusion, jealousy, or financial woe, the single-flesh union of husband and wife should tackle it together. A wise couple will soon discover that if they keep the right perspective of being on the same team, no outside influence can tear them apart. "Now I beseech you, brethren, by the name of our Lord Jesus Christ, that ye all speak the same thing, and that there be no divisions among you; but that ye be perfectly joined together in the same mind and in the same judgment" (I Corinthians 1:10).
Many people fail to realize that marriage, just like any other intimate relationship, is bound to have conflict. No two people can get along 100 percent of the time; but husbands and wives can learn how to diffuse volatile situations and come to an agreement on most issues that might plague an otherwise happy home. Because holy matrimony is held in such high regard by God, the institution is a primary target for conflict and controversy. But spiritually astute couples can recognize when the relationship is under attack and avert some marital casualties, overcoming marriage problems with wisdom, knowledge and understanding. Issues that can contribute to marital discord include acts of infidelity, money woes, chronic illness, or unemployment. Separation due to long distance employment or deployment, children from a previous relationship, or caring for kids with special can also add stress.
There is no magic formula, but there are three key elements to overcoming marriage problems: commitment, communication, and compassion. When both spouses are committed to the relationship, the ability to ward off discord is increased. Husbands and wives who are equally committed to seeing the marriage through sickness and health, poverty and wealth, as long as they both shall live are more apt to endure hardships. Commitment is the vehicle which enables couples to stay together when there are more bills than money at the end of the month. Commitment is the impetus that compels husbands to work two jobs to keep food on the table. Commitment compels wives to love their husbands in spite of an act of infidelity and failure to keep a solemn vow. Without commitment, overcoming marriage problems is virtually impossible.
Communication is vital for any relationship to thrive, especially marriage. Couples who give one another the silent treatment instead of sharing concerns are playing a dangerous game. Overcoming marriage problems can be difficult when one partner shuts down and refuses to discuss what is troubling them. How can you give an answer when you do not know the question? The silent treatment is a selfish and immature way to resolve conflicts; it just will not work. By keeping the lines of communication open, sharing heartfelt concerns while listening intently to one another, husbands and wives can discover one of the keys to overcoming marriage problems without soliciting the aid of counselors. Developing listening good skills; refraining from debate, disputes and arguments; and allowing a mate an opportunity for self-expression without berating or belittling are crucial to the success of matrimony.
The third key to a successful union, compassion, is the ability to show mercy to those who are hurting. During marital conflict, husbands and wives suffer from an alienation of affection, a lack of physical intimacy, or a cessation the close companionship they may have once enjoyed. Acts of infidelity can have a devastating affect on both the victim and the perpetrator. Victims of spousal unfaithfulness may feel rejection, anger, frustration, or rage. The guilty spouse must deal with the guilt, shame, or disappointment of falling prey to an adulterous affair. Compassionate couples who are able to walk in one anothers shoes have a greater chance of overcoming marriage problems than those who refuse to look beyond faults. The husband who has committed an offense must first forgive himself, then ask God and his wife for forgiveness. Likewise, a wife who is a victim of adultery must try to find compassion in spite of feelings of betrayal and righteous indignation. If the guilty party exhibits remorse or makes a genuine effort to reform, the offended spouse must be willing to work through the pain of an adulterous affair. Relationships full of commitment, communication, and compassion can overcome all things; and time heals all wounds.
Husbands and wives interested in overcoming marriage problems must have the right perspective on wedlock. When two join together as one, they form a single social unit having male and female components. Over time, that single unit should become so cohesive and so formidable that nothing from the outside world can destroy it. Male and female should learn to work together as a team, eating the same food, sleeping in the same bed, doing the same things. When an enemy comes into the household, whether the enemy is called discord, confusion, jealousy, or financial woe, the single-flesh union of husband and wife should tackle it together. A wise couple will soon discover that if they keep the right perspective of being on the same team, no outside influence can tear them apart. "Now I beseech you, brethren, by the name of our Lord Jesus Christ, that ye all speak the same thing, and that there be no divisions among you; but that ye be perfectly joined together in the same mind and in the same judgment" (I Corinthians 1:10).
Many people fail to realize that marriage, just like any other intimate relationship, is bound to have conflict. No two people can get along 100 percent of the time; but husbands and wives can learn how to diffuse volatile situations and come to an agreement on most issues that might plague an otherwise happy home. Because holy matrimony is held in such high regard by God, the institution is a primary target for conflict and controversy. But spiritually astute couples can recognize when the relationship is under attack and avert some marital casualties, overcoming marriage problems with wisdom, knowledge and understanding. Issues that can contribute to marital discord include acts of infidelity, money woes, chronic illness, or unemployment. Separation due to long distance employment or deployment, children from a previous relationship, or caring for kids with special can also add stress.
There is no magic formula, but there are three key elements to overcoming marriage problems: commitment, communication, and compassion. When both spouses are committed to the relationship, the ability to ward off discord is increased. Husbands and wives who are equally committed to seeing the marriage through sickness and health, poverty and wealth, as long as they both shall live are more apt to endure hardships. Commitment is the vehicle which enables couples to stay together when there are more bills than money at the end of the month. Commitment is the impetus that compels husbands to work two jobs to keep food on the table. Commitment compels wives to love their husbands in spite of an act of infidelity and failure to keep a solemn vow. Without commitment, overcoming marriage problems is virtually impossible.
Communication is vital for any relationship to thrive, especially marriage. Couples who give one another the silent treatment instead of sharing concerns are playing a dangerous game. Overcoming marriage problems can be difficult when one partner shuts down and refuses to discuss what is troubling them. How can you give an answer when you do not know the question? The silent treatment is a selfish and immature way to resolve conflicts; it just will not work. By keeping the lines of communication open, sharing heartfelt concerns while listening intently to one another, husbands and wives can discover one of the keys to overcoming marriage problems without soliciting the aid of counselors. Developing listening good skills; refraining from debate, disputes and arguments; and allowing a mate an opportunity for self-expression without berating or belittling are crucial to the success of matrimony.
The third key to a successful union, compassion, is the ability to show mercy to those who are hurting. During marital conflict, husbands and wives suffer from an alienation of affection, a lack of physical intimacy, or a cessation the close companionship they may have once enjoyed. Acts of infidelity can have a devastating affect on both the victim and the perpetrator. Victims of spousal unfaithfulness may feel rejection, anger, frustration, or rage. The guilty spouse must deal with the guilt, shame, or disappointment of falling prey to an adulterous affair. Compassionate couples who are able to walk in one anothers shoes have a greater chance of overcoming marriage problems than those who refuse to look beyond faults. The husband who has committed an offense must first forgive himself, then ask God and his wife for forgiveness. Likewise, a wife who is a victim of adultery must try to find compassion in spite of feelings of betrayal and righteous indignation. If the guilty party exhibits remorse or makes a genuine effort to reform, the offended spouse must be willing to work through the pain of an adulterous affair. Relationships full of commitment, communication, and compassion can overcome all things; and time heals all wounds.
Overcoming Marriage Problems
![]()
Reviewed by Anonymous
on
9:45 PM
Rating:
